juggling

the choice of words, between want and need.

i don’t know whether i should just empty you entirely and begin shedding every bit of our conversation and shove them all into the wastebasket. because truthfully this is all beginning to take a toll on me, slowly i am disintegrate into nothing and becoming deathlike in each my movement. yesterday i call it hunger but now i realize it is only the clamor of the heart towards something i am unable to find in you. or the fact you are unfounded yourself. of course you might read this and think of the multitudes of reasons behind my endless permutation of words that mean nothing; you try to put my face and my words side by side yet fail to coalesce them together.