as if there is anything substantial to be done over here. tomorrow morning, i shall be off to adelaide, attend some supposedly WARM camp (that’s not warm at all….) and afterwards, spend some three days over there, then in melbourne (i have a week to spare, and a heart to bear), then off to tasmania. i suppose i am not terribly excited by all this. but say everyone one has to marvel at life and be merry and everything. but i am no aesthete not anymore, if anything.
walking some seven kilometers back and forth the beach yesterday. the streets were empty, and there is nothing to see except the sea. the bubbles froth, the waves roll, the water yonder looks very still. at the beginning of each section in v. woolf’s the waves, se explains each transition from dawn till dusk with poetic ease. but i am still uneased.
i have an insurmountable problem yesterday. it is between both, persons. and i do not, cannot, detect a tinge of jealousy whether it is present or not, but i shall remain, indifferent. if any one wishes to marry me, he may go to the father or brother. my mother. there is no other way around it. i am bad when it comes to hints. one either comes, bursts forth exclaiming everything or do nothing at all.
kierkegard mentioned that there are three stages of life. one that is purely devoted towards pleasing the senses (imagine Rimbaud in his youth) then one of humanity, that is to behave in a most moral and correct way (aaaah, i dont know who, the humanists? ) and then when both of these stages are boring in themselves, with no divine purpose, then only one could, act, on a leap of faith, to believe in a supreme god and act according to his will.
for our own will, however free we may reign it too, is eventually torn between two dualities, one of angelic and one of the animal. the right path or the wrong one. all multiplicities can be boiled down to this. and that is why, at the beginning of each rakaah, you say, guide me to the right path.
i think i like the greeks and the romantics better than all the other etas in philosophy. kant and hegel were concerned with all theories of knowledge, that is, what we can know and how we perceive knowledge. all this seems very removed from me. at least the romantics were concerned with feelings, however erratic they may be. the greeks were genuine in their pursuit, and all else is boring.
they say mulla sadra is the first… existentialist, so to speak. malas nak baca lagi.
i guess i have to go into the habit of selecting the books that are interesting and useful at the same time.
as it stands now, i have no time for plath, pessoa, or boring murakami.
to be bored is the highest insult for creation.
perkaraperkara 