i am too weak to continue living like this.
they say you must be brimming with positivity at all times.
but i keep forgetting. lingering my mind with images that do not concern me.
i am far removed from the present
i think my head swims somewhere else.
i am delusional.
i am not grounded.
of course, when you compare this with all those case studies in R.D Laing’s book “The Divided Self”, i am far better. to not put yourself at the lowest of the low. or to rise above. to stay mediocre. and i am even failing at being normal. i cannot hang in the middle between two extremes.
i must choose.
perkaraperkara 